REJECTION (by Janine Mick Wills)
No one likes to be rejected. God created man to enjoy fellowship with Him and with mankind (Genesis 2). If you are feeling rejected, take heart. Christ understands (Isaiah 53:3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not). It is my prayer that the following may be of help.*
DEFINITION – Withholding love or attention from another person when one can bestow that love or attention.
Rejection is the failure to fulfill the second commandment that Christ gave.
John 13:34, 35 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another. Matthew 22:37-39 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.
Acceptance is the antithesis of rejection. Being accepted by God is the most important. A person can have that acceptance through Christ.
Roman 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. Ephesians 1:6 To the praise of the glory of his grace, wherein he hath made us accepted in the beloved.
When a Christian is rejected by the one(s) she loves(s) most, God is there to sustain her.
Psalm. 9:10 And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, LORD, hast not forsaken them that seek thee. Psalm 27:10 When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up. Psalm 94:14 For the LORD will not cast off his people, neither will he forsake his inheritance. Isaiah 49:15, 16 Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me.
A rejected Christian can give her hurt to the Lord.
Jeremiah 33:3 Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not. 1 Peter 5:7 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.
A Christian may suffer rejection for her stand for Christ, but He will be with her.
1 John 3: 1 Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God: therefore the world knoweth us not, because it knew him not. 2 Timothy 4:16,17 At my first answer no man stood with me, but all men forsook me: I pray God that it may not be laid to their charge. Notwithstanding the Lord stood with me, and strengthened me; that by me the preaching might be fully known, and that all the Gentiles might hear: and I was delivered out of the mouth of the lion.
A Christian’s rejection may be self-inflicted. Especially if she believes her self-importance (See Selfishness). People do not want to be around someone who is puffed up.
Romans 12:3 For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith. Galatians 6:3 For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself.
Though a rejected Christian may feel like it is the end of her world, it really is not.
2 Corinthians 4:8,9 We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed.
Fearing what others think will only cause problems for a Christian.
Proverbs 29:25 The fear of man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe.
Man will fail you. Trust in God instead.
Psalm 118: 8 It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.
Rejection can lead to bitterness, which leads to others being hurt.
Hebrews 12:15 Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled.
God desires a Christian to be strong in Him.
Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.
As Christians, we are to emulate our Savior. His earthly life was one of sacrifice and giving (Matthew 20:28 Even as the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many). If you are feeling rejected, ask the Lord to help you look upon the needs of others. The benefits are twofold:
- It allows you to be a vessel God can use to be a blessing.
- It helps you to look outward instead of inward, which often alleviates the feeling of rejection.
May today be the day you start accepting yourself and God’s love.
*The following has been modified from a counseling project I completed while attending Ambassador Baptist College. I pray it will help those struggling with rejection. Some information taken from Walter and Trudy Fremont, Effective Christian Counselor (Bob Jones University Press, SC, 1991).